Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
---- Fred Allen

A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
---- John Ciardi

This may be the most interesting blog theme I've ever seen. http://eflgeek.com/index.php Definitely in my top 5 at least.
---- Steve Dembo

Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy.
---- Isaac Newton

Arguments over grammar and style are often as fierce as those over IBM versus Mac, and as fruitless as Coke versus Pepsi and boxers versus briefs.
---- Jack Lynch

If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur.
---- Doug Larson

As soon as I buy the moose head, I have to go pick up some KY jelly.
---- Mary Roninette Kowal

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
---- Lily Tomlin

Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.
---- Author Unknown

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
---- Thomas A. Edison

Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one.
---- Malcom Forbes

A magician pulls rabbits out of hats. An experimental psychologist pulls habits out of rats.
---- anonymous

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.
---- Edward Abbey

Technology will not replace teachers...teachers who use technology will
probably replace teachers who do not.
---- Ray Clifford

I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him.
---- Galileo Galilei

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.
---- Mitch Hedberg

There are painters who transform the sun to a yellow spot, but there are others who with the help of their art and their intelligence, transform a yellow spot into the sun.
---- Pablo Picasso

"It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'"
---- Sam Levenson

To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of whom are absent.
---- Robert Copeland

Any man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man.
---- J. Robert Oppenheimer

I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn.
---- Albert Einstein

To have another language is to possess a second soul.
---- Charlemagne

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
---- Evan Esar

Books to the ceiling,
Books to the sky,
My pile of books is a mile high.
How I love them! How I need them!
I'll have a long beard by the time I read them.
---- Arnold Lobel

I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it.
---- Terry Pratchett