As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life - so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls.
---- M. Cartmill

To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of whom are absent.
---- Robert Copeland

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
---- Lily Tomlin

The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one's real and one's declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish spurting out ink.
---- George Orwell

As soon as I buy the moose head, I have to go pick up some KY jelly.
---- Mary Roninette Kowal

Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation.
---- Kin Hubbard

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
---- Fred Allen

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
---- H. G. Wells

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
---- Thomas A. Edison

There are painters who transform the sun to a yellow spot, but there are others who with the help of their art and their intelligence, transform a yellow spot into the sun.
---- Pablo Picasso

A magician pulls rabbits out of hats. An experimental psychologist pulls habits out of rats.
---- anonymous

Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.
---- Author Unknown

A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
---- John Ciardi

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.
---- Edward Abbey

Those who know nothing of foreign languages, knows nothing of their own.”
---- Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749 -1832)

Arguments over grammar and style are often as fierce as those over IBM versus Mac, and as fruitless as Coke versus Pepsi and boxers versus briefs.
---- Jack Lynch

We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything.
---- Thomas A. Edison

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
---- Gail Godwin

The least of learning is done in the classrooms
---- Thomas Merton

It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.
---- Arnold Toynbee

The voodoo priest and all his powders were as nothing compared to espresso, cappuccino, and mocha, which are stronger than all the religions of the world combined, and perhaps stronger than the human soul itself.
---- Mark Helprin, Memoir from Antproof Case, 1995

To have another language is to possess a second soul.
---- Charlemagne

Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy.
---- Isaac Newton

Books to the ceiling,
Books to the sky,
My pile of books is a mile high.
How I love them! How I need them!
I'll have a long beard by the time I read them.
---- Arnold Lobel

Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one.
---- Malcom Forbes