Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
---- H. G. Wells

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.
---- Edward Abbey

To have another language is to possess a second soul.
---- Charlemagne

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
---- Fred Allen

"It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'"
---- Sam Levenson

I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn.
---- Albert Einstein

Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy.
---- Isaac Newton

If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur.
---- Doug Larson

It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.
---- Franklin D. Roosevelt

The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one's real and one's declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish spurting out ink.
---- George Orwell

I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it.
---- Terry Pratchett

Books to the ceiling,
Books to the sky,
My pile of books is a mile high.
How I love them! How I need them!
I'll have a long beard by the time I read them.
---- Arnold Lobel

Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
---- Terry Pratchett

Arguments over grammar and style are often as fierce as those over IBM versus Mac, and as fruitless as Coke versus Pepsi and boxers versus briefs.
---- Jack Lynch

I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.
---- Mitch Hedberg

A magician pulls rabbits out of hats. An experimental psychologist pulls habits out of rats.
---- anonymous

I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him.
---- Galileo Galilei

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
---- Isaac Asimov

Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.
---- Author Unknown

As soon as I buy the moose head, I have to go pick up some KY jelly.
---- Mary Roninette Kowal

Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence.
---- Robert Frost

Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation.
---- Kin Hubbard

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
---- Thomas A. Edison

Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster!
---- unknown

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
---- Lily Tomlin